[Thursday, April 29, 2004]

Song from blog tetangga, nice....sweet....and sad...

Notice me
Take my hand
Why are we
Strangers when
Our love is strong
Why carry on without me?

Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I make believe
That you are here
It's the only way
I see clear
What have I done?
You seem to move on easy

I may have made it rain
Please forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
And this song's my sorry

At night I pray
That soon your face will fade away

(BRITNEY SPREARS: Everytime)

* Posted by 3k4 @ 5:30 AM *

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[Tuesday, April 27, 2004]

Quotes of the day:
"IF IT DOESN'T KILL YOU, IT WILL MAKE YOU STRONGER...."

I promise i'll be allright soon. But meanwhile, just give me some more times to grieve and weep.

* Posted by 3k4 @ 11:23 PM *

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A brand new day for me, in every meaning of it.
Yesterday is a memory, today is a reality, and tomorrow still a mystery....but full of hope.
This is the new me...ready to seize the coming days.

* Posted by 3k4 @ 5:30 AM *

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[Monday, April 26, 2004]

An old song....but i like it so much at present moment.

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for the words to get to their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start

Have you ever found that one
You've dreamed of all of your life
You'd do anything to look into her eyes
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed you eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for the day when they will care

What I gotta do to get you in my arms baby
What I gotta do to to your heart
To make you understand how I need you next to me
Gotta get you into my world
'Coz baby I can't sleep

(BRANDY: Have You Ever?)

* Posted by 3k4 @ 3:39 PM *

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[Tuesday, April 20, 2004]

My deep condolesence to Ook and Yayuk, hope your Mom will get the best place next to Him, and wish you all got the strength and faith to move on.
I am so sorry for replying the SMS so late, for i just open it.

Hearing such kind of news made me really miss my family so much....
God...please keep them safe in your protection.

* Posted by 3k4 @ 7:06 AM *

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[Monday, April 19, 2004]

Who can say where the road goes,
Where the day flows?
Only time...

And who can say if your love grows,
As your heart chose?
Only time...

Who can say why your heart sighs,
As your love flies?
Only time...

And who can say why your heart cries,
When your love dies?
Only time...

Who can say when the roads meet,
That love might be,
In your heart.

And who can say when the day sleeps,
If the night keeps all your heart?
Night keeps all your heart...

(Enya: ONLY TIME)

* Posted by 3k4 @ 2:06 AM *

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[Friday, April 16, 2004]

Aaaaaaarrrrrghhhh 4 days left to the exam........ +_+

Starting the final countdown *kayak lagu aja, hehehe*. But i still missed a lot of things to read *sigh*. My mistake...my mistake...my mistake *repetition to emphasize*, why ididn't read it all before, piece by piece, just like the previous period? Why i felt so easy because i'll only have 1 exam *instead of 3 like the last time*? Why i put it all to the end? Why...oh why?

Well....regret always comes late. Just don't do it again next time.

* Posted by 3k4 @ 2:48 AM *

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[Wednesday, April 14, 2004]

Ah yes....i forgot to tell something. I met an old friend in Brussel, she's Edwin, my high school mate in SMA 1 Bogor. She's taking her master degree in Belgium, she's the friend of Mas Rahmat and coincidentally we borrowed her room to stay for a night *what a small world*. So we met on Monday *just before i got back here*, chit-chat for a while, and memorizing the old days *how i missed those old days*.

Then when we're on the way back home, we met Graciela and Santos again! They're back from Paris and apparantley we were using the same bus again. Gee...what a good coincidence ^^

Another progress about me, i begin to like coffee and chocolate! I'd never had coffee as a routine drinks before *i only had it if i have to stay awake the whole night or so*, and i'd never like chocolate either because it is too sweet and taste not good in my tongue. But here, everthing change and turns completely different. I need coffee every morning to start my day, and i love Belgium chocolate more than ever *grin*. What a complete turn out ;)

And one more thing i like about Belgium, it's the waffle!!! I'd never found such a great taste as long as i am in Netherlands. It was full with cream, layered by chocolate, thick waffle, taste super-delicious *hmm...yummy, made me wanna*. Maybe it is right that Ducth people don't care much about food and taste, so all the foods here are based on its function, just to keep us alive and fill the starvation. Hhhh...how i miss Indonesian food...my home-cooks and my whole family to have dinner with.

* Posted by 3k4 @ 3:31 AM *

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Hey it's been quite a long time since the last time i wrote in this blog. Yes...i was busy last week, all assignment had reached its deadline, paper, report, presentation, etc...etc. But at least it was closed nicely, i had a great weekend that suppose to be enough to re-charge my battery.

I went to Belgium last weekend with Jo, Ika, Kiki, and Ari. Fitri cannot made it since she had to study the whole weekend because some of her relatives would come to give a visit on Monday. It was seems unplanned, i just got the invitation on wednesday evening, later on Jo accompany to buy the ticket at Utrecht, and then we left early in the morning on Friday. We went by Eurolines bus, which was departed from Utrecht centraal. And coincidentally i met Graciela with Santos who will use the same bus to Paris. They're one of the latin-america people who're nice and friendly, so it was a pleasant surprise to had a trip with them.

In Brussel we were picked up by Mas Rahmat, Kiki's friend who's studying in Belgium for almost 2 years. He was so nice, he cooked us lunch, shrimp and miso soup *yummy....it was delicious* and took us everywhere wish to go. The following day we went to Gent to met one other of Kiki's friend, Alexandra. Again she also nice, she picked us by car, invite us to her house and meet her family, and then drove us to Antwerp where we would stay for 2 night. Then we travelling around Antwerp and went to Brugge on the following day. Act like a tourist, bought souvenirs, joined canal tour, took a lot of pictures, and be a food tourist for sure. Anytime anywhere we're tasting the coffee, chocolate, and another food stuffs ^^

What a trip if i may said so. Visiting 4 cities in only 3 days, a very nice old cities, met nice and friendly people, and one of experience that i really value at. When i met Tante Jong, i thought she's the nicest person i've ever met, but then i met Mas Rahmat and Alexandra who are as nice as she is. I really thankful to be gathered with such a nice people.

Then about the country, i really like Belgium! The people seems more friendly, and the historical buildings are so many. There's even one old building that came from 950s, means it is more than 1000 years old! It was so unbelieveable, i really amazed with the country, they can protect their heritage. Everything are still complete, indeed most of them are still fully function as the it was. So ironic if i compare it with the condition in my own country *hhh....what a total difference*

We're back on Monday, and we suppose to have study week right now. Yet, i haven't start to study at all *sigh*. Today i finish 2 of my assignment, tomorrow i will hand in both. So tonight i'd better start to study...study....study... +_+

* Posted by 3k4 @ 2:22 AM *

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[Wednesday, April 07, 2004]

I thought spring finally comingm, but looks like winter is extended. Because though it's look like spring *sunshine & colorful flowers bloom*, the temperature still freezing. See today, it was raining almost the whole day. Well....not the whole time exactly, it was raining then stopped then raining again and stopped again and kept that way until the afternoon. Is not that i hate rain, but in such temperature, getting wet is the last thing in your mind. And to make it worse, i dont have any winter coat right now! Yes...that blue-thick-super warm coat was damaged when i washed it last week. It's my fault to put the speed in normal setting instead of slower one, that makes the whole feathers that fill in the layers vanished. Now it's look more like a rain coat and not warm at all *sigh*

Aaaarggggghhhhhh i can't sleep........................@_@

It's really not good, coz in the situation like this i usually think everything that seems unecessary to think on. Hhhhhhhhhh.............anybody have sleeping pills?

* Posted by 3k4 @ 7:18 AM *

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[Tuesday, April 06, 2004]

Let me watch by the fire and remember my days
And it may be a trick of the firelight
But the flickering pages that trouble my sight
Is a book I'm afraid to write

It's the book of my days, it's the book of my life
And it's cut like a fruit on the blade of a knife
And it's all there to see as the section reveals
There's some sorrow in every life

If it reads like a puzzle, a wandering maze
Then I won't understand ‘til the end of my days
I'm still forced to remember,
Remember the words of my life

There are promises broken and promises kept
Angry words that were spoken, when I should have wept
There's a chapter of secrets, and words to confess
If I lose everything that I possess
There's a chapter on loss and a ghost who won't die
There's a chapter on love where the ink's never dry
There are sentences served in a prison I built out of lies.

Though the pages are numbered
I can't see where they lead
For the end is a mystery no-one can read
In the book of my life

There's a chapter on fathers a chapter on sons
There are pages of conflicts that nobody won
And the battles you lost and your bitter defeat,
There's a page where we fail to meet

There are tales of good fortune that couldn't be planned
There's a chapter on god that I don't understand
There's a promise of Heaven and Hell but I'm damned if I see

Though the pages are numbered
I can't see where they lead
For the end is a mystery no-one can read
In the book of my life

Now the daylight's returning
And if one sentence is true
All these pages are burning
And all that's left is you

Though the pages are numbered
I can't see where they lead
For the end is a mystery no-one can read
In the book of my life

(Sting: THE BOOK OF MY LIFE)

* Posted by 3k4 @ 6:42 AM *

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I think i got an insomnia. I can hardly sleep early in the evening resently, indeed i usually sleep early in the morning, around 2 or 3 am. Then i have to wake verryyyy late on the following days otherwise i would feel sleeepyyyy for the whole day.

Any psycological problem? Stresses? Desperation? Mentality unbalance? Distractful spirit? Why...oh why?

* Posted by 3k4 @ 6:36 AM *

*****

The last week had been exhausting for me. I moved! Yes...finally the day had come to move to another room with private shower & toillet. It's been crazy, i have to empited my old room on the same day i got the key to my new room. And with stuffs like mine, how can i do it in a short moment like that, especially without help from anybody? So i arranged some strategy then, i have to start emptied my room from the night before. I asked Ari and Kiki to help me with the large stuffs like fridge, tv, and sofa. But since they're available above 10 o'clock in the evening, then i started to move some of my small stuffs with the help of other friends *thanks Jo, Amel, Ika, &Aretha* to Ibu Titiek's room. And later in the evening we move those big stuff to Debbie's room *thanks to Kiki & Ari*

Then on the following day i have to move all those stuff alone! Bcoz nobody avalaible since it was thursday and everybody had a class full day *sigh*. I can tell you, it was TIRING, EXHAUSTING, yet i still cannot move all things, especially those big stuff. Fortunately Jo and Ika help me to move them yesterday, otherwise it would take some times longer if i had to wait for the boys .

But everything pays, or at least i can say so. My new room is smaller but very comfortable. Not because of the private bathroom *that's definitely a point*, but since i feel a lot more hommy here. Dont know why, maybe because i am not used to large room as before, which more like "a house" rather than "a bed room" and made me more lonely most of the times. Well...anyway it doesnt matter. What's matter i like my new room and i feel this would be my sanctuary, my privacy with 100% my own territory *none unexpected guess can step in without my permission ^^*

And i would like to present my deepest gratitude to Joice *the next PPI-Siaga gonna be* hehehehe.

* Posted by 3k4 @ 6:12 AM *

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